Okay, I finally think I have my act together. It's been a little over 2 months since I have last blogged. I feel like a failure but then again I realize that I have to be fair to myself and my family. I will be completely honest with you. I haven't been myself. I have been going through one of those 'down' times as a person and parent.
I should have kept blogging but I didn't want that side of me to be shown. From now on.... the good, bad & the ugly will be shown. :) I was sad, angry, frustrated & exhausted. I was living in the bliss of having a new baby and enjoying every moment I had with him and my other children, when I started waking up and not feeling like myself. Not wanting to get out of bed. Not wanting to get dressed. Focusing on every negative part of my life. I don't know why. I have so much to be thankful for. I have so many wonderful people in my circle I can turn to, to help me get through whatever it is that I needed. There was something that was missing. There was some real reason I wasn't feeling myself.
I decided after almost 6 weeks of feeling like this that I should go to the doctor. It took my mother telling me, "Jess, you don't sound right and you haven't been acting yourself and I am worried about you." To hear those words from her were not cool. I knew I had to buck up and see what was going on.
I got the test results back from the doctor and I was glad to hear nothing major was wrong. She said that my potassium levels & vitamin d levels were VERY low. I need to be on supplements. She also said that I have an under active thyroid. My numbers with that are just a little bit lower than what she would like so not enough to give me synthetic thyroid. She said the vitamins should help that out as well. At the time I thought this was all very silly until I looked it up on the net and educated myself.
I started on all my new vitamins and feel like a NEW person! I am so thankful I went to the doctor. It's so easy to take my kids, but when it comes to myself, well.... that's just a different story.
I didn't know if I would start blogging again because honestly I didn't know if I would have the time. I realized that after weeks of not doing it and many people writing, texting and calling me wondering why I haven't blogged made me think that I really need to start back up. It gives me something to do for me. It gives me a moment to speak my peace and document my thoughts. Plus I know that years down the road, I am going to love to go back through all of these posts and re-live 'my moments'.
My life right now is full. Jordan has started flag football. He loves it and the joy I see on his face makes my heart explode. I am the team mom so I'm organizing the snack and drink schedule and making sure everyone is volunteered to help with our community service hours.
Dominic is growing like a weed. He amazes me everyday with all of his new words & thoughts. I am in the process of finding a preschool for him so he can start in Sept. He is so ready! I am so ready!! :)
The past year has been amazing. Having three boys has truly been a dream come true for me. I sincerely cannot believe Dycen will be ONE on April 5th. That is absolutely CRAZY to me! I am planning a HUGE first birthday party. I spend at least a 1/2 hour on it everyday just trying to make sure I have all my ducks in a row. It is going to be a carnival at our church. I can honestly tell you he has no idea what is going on but Jordan and Dominic sure do and they can't wait!
Demond and I have re-done our 'eating area'. We had someone come in and texturize under our chair rail and do an accent wall for us. We painted and added new wall decor. It totally freshened up that room and I now love sitting in there. It's amazing what a fresh new coat of paint can do. I will post pics when I can find them. :-/
Work is great for me! I am starting to get really busy. I love it! I have built up a large 'regular customer base' which is really helping me and my pockets. :) I love a full bar with laughing, happy, fun loving guests.
I'm off tonight and look forward to a girls night out at my favorite restaurant, Bonefish. Until then, I have a huge mountain of laundry, bathrooms that need my love & two cute little boys who want to wrestle.
It's good to be back.
Love ya'll
oxox,
jess
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